KRUG

good news first.

i got the job i described in the previous post.  i’ll be starting on the 15th and i am extremely excited.  i’m going to be making more, doing what i enjoy, and learning a lot about interesting fields.

but the bad news seems to have more drama and seems to stick with me longer so my excitement about the job is overshadowed and belittled.

i am extremely frustrated with my friends out here.  i have been doing what i know to do to make friends and build relationships but it seems that nobody is taking the time to really get to know me.  i feel like everyone is making snap judgements and not giving me a chance to explain my decisions or even my faults.  and i can’t seem to get people to talk about why they keep doing this.  i can understand them having a problem to an extent.  but the way i deal with mine is to discuss them with the people that are involved.  i like to talk things out and come to an agreement or a middle ground of realization.  here, they just ignore me and i have to fight my way back in.

it’s getting to the point that i don’t even want to try anymore.  that if they can’t open their eyes to who i am or even forgive me for mistakes, then i would be better off not worrying about it.

and it’s not everyone out here.  actually it’s almost no one but at this moment it feels way bigger than that.

i may get to go see rissa sometime in the near future and she’ll be able to make me feel better.  i hope it works out because i’m already looking forward to it.